hmmm.. i'm sure i didnt post d 3:55pm entry... wonder who did tt?? well whoever tt is, u sure noe what i'm thinking. wow cool huh.. u got some telephatic thing going on.. thnx for saying wateva i wanted to say and breaking into my account.. awww.. u guys r still d best!
when i read thru the sunday papers abt uni admission.. my heart almost sank again. into despair and disappointment. but on second thots, it wasnt almost despair and disappontment. it was a lil of anger and hatred. i'm not sure whether towards tt whole uni thing or at myself for producing such grades. and reading wat my frens hv to say or feel makes me think further. i've always thot i'm a v superficial person. i take things lightly and for granted at times. well its was proven already tt i aint tt mature. maybe the qoute 'let nature takes its own course' isnt always good. i get over stuff easily and not get overly bothered by anything. so tell me now is tt gd or bad?? do i easily give up? tt's wat somebody said to me... maybe he's right. one day i have to do someting tt i dont have interest in. specifically for survival and doing it conscientiously. is tt the only way out of tis mess?? the mess tt i've created for myself? why cant i do sumtin for myself? at least for once! for me to really pursue my interest. or maybe its not meant to be? everytime i start on sumtin i love doin, there will be an obstacle, a hindrance. it happens all the time. and everyime tis happens, i lose interest. why? is tis wat God had planned for me?
should i just adhere to my folks' decision or should i make my own? when they forced me to do something i always tell myself i'll prove otherwise to them. when i decide for myself, it always backfire. so wat is right for me now?!
SHIT!! i am juz gonna wait for tt last letter. if in any case it doesnt land in my hands, i am going to make my own decision. i'm gonna make my life!
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It is not time or opportunity that isto determine intimacy;-- it is disposition alone. Seven years wouldbe insufficient to make some people acquainted with each other, and seven days are more than enough for others. *FaeryVixen*
